A fat woman came into the shoe store today....
Wait, that was somebody else. My customer story is a little broader. Heh.
A customer came in today looking for a VCR. Not the DVD/VCR combos we still carry for another six months or so mind you, a VCR. Now, I showed him the little combo thingies we had and Customer X said he wasn't interested. He only wanted a stand-alone VCR. Fucking really?!?!?
VHS is a format that was dead 10 YEARS AGO!!!!! What could you have that's possibly interesting enough to still watch on VHS after all that time? Game film of your high school football team that you were obviously the aide or perhaps water boy? No one cares anymore. Get a life fucko. Family movies of the kids when they were little? Fat chance! This guy was so morbidly obese that even if he could find his reproductive organs, the chance of his being able to copulate with a woman (assuming he could find a willing one) is nil. What's that you say sir? You have all the Oscar ceremonies since 1982 recorded? Well, if that's your idea of entertainment, sitting in your grease-stained recliner watching Nick Cage's acceptance speech for Moonstruck (ugh) with a bowl of fritos, yelling at your mother for buying the off-brand bean dip cause it was 17 cents cheaper than Frito-Lay all the while wondering why the girl who rang you up at Target hasn't called you yet after you gave her ALL your numbers then I'm afraid you have no choice but to kill yourself. Your life is just too sad for it to continue.
I know lots of people who work retail and have bad customers, but it seems like the crazies always seek me out. This guy actually had the nerve to say to me that DVD was just a fad, and that VHS was the better of the two options. Well, DVD is getting replaced by Blu-ray, so I guess he's partially correct.
Why doesn't the world die?
Wednesday, March 17, 2010
Tuesday, March 16, 2010
YAWN!!!!!
Much like a great grizzly bear coming out of a long, winter hibernation, so too does this mighty Man of Majesty (Too much? It really helps to imagine it being read by David Attenborough) raise his head and purvey his surroundings in contemplation of the coming spring.
Hello!
I know it's been a long time since I've posted, but I've kind of been just getting through each day without much to say. But that all changes pretty soon.
We spent the winter with just one vehicle, and it worked out pretty well. But when the wife got herself a full-time jobby-job, I started having to walk to work. Which was not so bad really, it just ate up a lot of my day since I had to leave a little earlier every day. But with spring fast approaching, it's almost time for the resumption of eXtreme outdoor activities and that means the Hyundai was going to be put through a little more than it was designed for. So I went ahead and sold some stock, and bought myself a Colorado appropriate vehicle!
I got a '93 Jeep Grand Cherokee Laredo. It's gonna be a gas guzzler I know, but I drive 4 miles round trip every day so I think I can manage it.
It's Red! I'm also amused because there is another SUV in the spot 1 over from mine, which you can kind of see through the window. But it's just tiny by comparison.
The body and paint are in excellent shape.
I do like a nice rear end.
Sexy. But what do you think? I'm thinking maybe some nerf bars or some such thing, and definitely some rain shields for the windows. The windows, by the way, are tinted. Teeheehee.
I have been told that a Grille guard puts too much weight on the front end by someone much wiser in these things than I, but the front definitely needs something to make it look more eXtreme! I just don't know what to do. I think it's already wired for fog lights, but I'm not sure. There is a switch on the mirror for them.
It has a roof rack, but I kinda want to replace that with a different one. Maybe something with K. C. Lights on it.
Aww yeah. Full time baby!
Power to spare. Also, gas consumption. It's a trade-off.
Look at all that cargo room. A spare tire, which wasn't included, will soon occupy some of it though.
Got about another year left on these. Then.... upgrade!
So once all the piddly repair work is done (still under budget!!) and I have done a couple of things like add a radio, and a new alarm system with remote start, I should have a properly eXtreme vehicle. It's been a long time since I've been behind the wheel of a 4x4, and this is the first one I've owned myself. The thing I'm most excited about, is the fact that I live in a place that you never have to worry about getting a 4x4, and never getting any use out of it. In Dallas, people would get their fancy 4wd trucks, and then never take them off-road. Here, even if I never take it off-road (which, let's be honest here, of course I will) in the winters I am guaranteed to get use out of it cause it snows.
Also, it needs a name. Discuss.
Hello!
I know it's been a long time since I've posted, but I've kind of been just getting through each day without much to say. But that all changes pretty soon.
We spent the winter with just one vehicle, and it worked out pretty well. But when the wife got herself a full-time jobby-job, I started having to walk to work. Which was not so bad really, it just ate up a lot of my day since I had to leave a little earlier every day. But with spring fast approaching, it's almost time for the resumption of eXtreme outdoor activities and that means the Hyundai was going to be put through a little more than it was designed for. So I went ahead and sold some stock, and bought myself a Colorado appropriate vehicle!
I got a '93 Jeep Grand Cherokee Laredo. It's gonna be a gas guzzler I know, but I drive 4 miles round trip every day so I think I can manage it.
It's Red! I'm also amused because there is another SUV in the spot 1 over from mine, which you can kind of see through the window. But it's just tiny by comparison.
The body and paint are in excellent shape.
I do like a nice rear end.
Sexy. But what do you think? I'm thinking maybe some nerf bars or some such thing, and definitely some rain shields for the windows. The windows, by the way, are tinted. Teeheehee.
I have been told that a Grille guard puts too much weight on the front end by someone much wiser in these things than I, but the front definitely needs something to make it look more eXtreme! I just don't know what to do. I think it's already wired for fog lights, but I'm not sure. There is a switch on the mirror for them.
It has a roof rack, but I kinda want to replace that with a different one. Maybe something with K. C. Lights on it.
Aww yeah. Full time baby!
Power to spare. Also, gas consumption. It's a trade-off.
Look at all that cargo room. A spare tire, which wasn't included, will soon occupy some of it though.
Got about another year left on these. Then.... upgrade!
So once all the piddly repair work is done (still under budget!!) and I have done a couple of things like add a radio, and a new alarm system with remote start, I should have a properly eXtreme vehicle. It's been a long time since I've been behind the wheel of a 4x4, and this is the first one I've owned myself. The thing I'm most excited about, is the fact that I live in a place that you never have to worry about getting a 4x4, and never getting any use out of it. In Dallas, people would get their fancy 4wd trucks, and then never take them off-road. Here, even if I never take it off-road (which, let's be honest here, of course I will) in the winters I am guaranteed to get use out of it cause it snows.
Also, it needs a name. Discuss.
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